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What’s to Fear?

“When I die, Karen gets my amount of Social Security.” My husband was talking to some co-workers recently as he returned some keys he’d been using for parking meter collection.

One of them frowned. “Oh, don’t talk like that.”

“Why not? It’s gonna happen.” Jerry laughed on his way out the door.

He recounted the conversation to me as we walked to work the next day. “I think she thought I was being morbid.”

I smiled at him and squeezed his hand. “It’s just realistic. So many people are ‘subject to slavery all their lives’ (Heb 2:15) because of their fear of death.”

beautiful door Pictures, Images and PhotosThe anticipation of walking with Jesus through death’s door gives us such freedom. We need not fear if we’ve done enough. I just read a religious woman’s obituary. It was said of her that “all assignments were completed without fail.”

No one completes all life’s assignments without fail, but Jesus did. And he lets us stand in his perfection. Clothed in his clean robes, we get a pass. Glory. What’s to fear?

“For God did not appoint us to suffer wrath but to receive salvation through our Lord Jesus Christ. He died for us so that, whether we are awake or asleep, we may live together with him.” 1 Thessalonians 5:9-10

Jesus, thanks never seems like enough for the glorious future you have planned.

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Jesus Weeps

In treatment for prostate cancer, my husband says, “God loves me. Jesus is weeping with me.” That statement is the healing. Jerry has come to know the compassionate God. Exodus 34:6.

Wrestling with the indignities and struggles of life, we are tempted to say, “Where are you, God? What’s going on? Why is life so hard?”

We don’t really know what is going on. We have no idea of the heavenly wars. We don’t know what Satan is trying to stop. We don’t know what God is working to accomplish.

What Jerry and I do know:  God will carry us through. We know because God has already carried us through big sufferings: near-electrocution and mental illness; and small: car breakdowns and broken limbs.

God’s key healing is not the emotional and physical health. It’s the ability to rest in his compassion. We’ve been angry with God at times and we may be again. But we have learned that more is going on in the world and in history than we have any idea of.

While we may not know what is at stake, we know something is. And we know we are not alone in an unfeeling universe. Jesus weeps with us as he does with you.

Jesus, in the midst of today’s suffering, may we sense your tears.

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The Last Act?

"When these things begin to take place, stand up and lift up your heads, because your redemption is drawing near."Luke 21:28

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Lately, this scripture plays in the back of my mind, like a soundtrack. Is it my age or the stage of the world?  At 58, I'm at the beginning of my last act here. So maybe it's just looking forward to the epilogue, which I'm expecting to turn out to be the play itself.

And yet, the world's play begins to feel like it's in its final act, too. America is in deep debt. Many would have us believe there's only this story, so why not eat, drink, and be merry? Maybe I'm reacting to the pace of technological change. I'm getting tired of Twittering and Facebooking and who knows what the next big thing will be.

In Luke 21, Jesus talked about earthquakes, war, and famine. We're all aware of Haiti's grief. America fights two wars. People continue to starve to death. Those signs are already on stage. And yet, Jesus also mentions other signs of the end. "Jerusalem surrounded by armies"–not yet. "Signs in the sun, moon, and stars" –not that I can tell. Is "fainting from terror" like stress-related heart attacks? Is that sign is already in costume, waiting backstage?

Maybe it's just America's strutting on the stage that is coming to an end. Or just mine. Whether regional, global, or personal, there will be an end. What can we do?

We can lift up our heads to look for our redemption. We can be careful, as Jesus warns, so that our hearts are not "weighed down with…the anxieties of life" so we will be ready. He said he'll come unexpectedly, and yet he also gives us some warning signs to listen to. When the curtain comes down, whether on our life or the life of the world, may we have ears to hear his music.

Father, you, alone, know the time of the end. Please prepare our hearts.

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God’s File Cabinet

In November, I wrote that I was "Free to be Wrong," about Jerry's pathology report from prostate cancer. I'd expected clear margins and got reports of two areas of positive margin. I had so hoped for a good report.

And, yet! The first PSA report: "Undetectable." In spite of cancer cells right at the edge of the removed tissue, there are not enough cancer cells remaining to produce any prostate-specific antigen in the first blood test after the surgery. That means no radiation. That meant we were able to go to Colorado to see our little grandson and his parents. It meant Jerry went back to work in a few weeks. It meant we could push "CANCER" to the back of our minds.

There's a large file cabinet there, in the recesses of our hearts, with lots of pieces of our lives: retirement finances, job security, book sales, speaking engagements, all the dangers and uncertainties of the world.  Label: "God's Problems."  

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The cabinet contains those parts of our lives that we have no or little control over. They have to be God's responsibility. We can save and plan for retirement, but we don't know what health challenges may drain our reserves. We don't know whether the banks might fail. We don't know what disasters may come.  By his grace, we lock up our worries into this cabinet, kept in a dark back room.  What parts of your life need to be locked up in a "God's Problems" cabinet? Ministry future? Company sales? Health worries? May we all have grace to give God what is his responsibility and keep only what he gives us.

Father. In these days of uncertainty, be our rock. In these days of fear, be our comfort. In these long days of waiting, be our hope.

 

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Fear/Faith Percentage

John says in his first letter (4:18) "Perfect love casts out fear." Only God's love is perfect. As we receive/grasp/live in, his perfect love, we will be less and less fearful. Fear has, at points in my life, completely overwhelmed me. The severe mental illness I experienced in my twenties was an exercise in terror. Today, more than thirty years later, God has so flooded my heart with his love that, most of the time, I can relax and trust him.

This scripture suggests that fear and faith are opposites. I've thought of them lately as percentages of my heart. In the last few months, I've sensed an even deeper grasp of faith and loosening of fear. How about you? What percentage of each do
you carry? In the center of your heart, where they both reside, what
space does fear take up? How much does faith occupy?

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When we consider the future of America's economy, are we 30/70 on faith/fear? When we imagine our old age, what percentage of our heart is fear? As we contemplate the results of a medical test, is a quarter or three-quarters of our heart resting in God's love?

Faith doesn't mean everything is as we want it to be. Faith means God is with us in everything, working out his plans and purposes for our lives.

Father, thank you that you are intimately involved in our everyday activities. Cast out a bit more fear, today, will you? Thanks. We submit ourselves to you, our good and gracious creator.

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First, Fear

When we're seeking to expand our reach, why does fear usually come first ? Why does a new graduate student worry about whether she can do the work? Why is a new parent so often afraid of being a bad mom? What about those of us fearing our creative product will nosedive?

Watch this short video about a mother eagle pushing her eaglet from the nest: The Push

The eaglet trusts his mother, but that trust doesn't eliminate fear. When we're untried and inexperienced, we usually need to overcome fear. I assume God has his reasons for asking us to fight fear first.  Replacing fear with faith seems to be a crucial component of soaring.

But when we're in the fearing before the soaring, don't we wish it could have been set up differently? Couldn't this process have been made easier? 

I can just hear Papa-God: "Sweetie, I understand your difficulty here. I'm sorry it has to be so challenging. But, don't fight me. Keep trusting. Keep listening. Don't give up."

Okay. Not by power, not by might, but by his Spirit, let's hold on until his breath blows us into his highest purpose.

Father, help us submit to your processes.


 

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